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Is jealousy healthy in a relationship?

A little bit of healthy jealousy in any relationship can be beneficial. Yes, there’s a difference between healthy and unhealthy jealousy. Unhealthy jealousy is that person wanting to know your every move; checking your phone, questioning your attire, just an overall lack of trust and even commitment to the relationship. An example of healthy trust is seeing other people being attracted to your mate and you getting excited about it because guess what, he or she is your mate, not theirs!

Even being a little territorial about your mate can be sexy and healthy, it shows that they mean something to you, that clearly they are attractive and you are still attracted to them. Let’s be real, no one wants someone that nobody wants!  So if you feel like random people are being attracted to your mate or are flirting with them passively, enjoy it. At the end of the day, the two of you are together. 

How can relocation as a couple work well?

When engaging in a long distance relationship it takes a lot of planning and strategy. One of the reasons why couples don’t last long in these relationships is because they haven’t discussed the “what ifs” before they parted ways. They haven’t talked about out how they plan to stay connected with one another. Remember you became a couple because you were dating each other. Dating doesn’t stop just because there are thousands of miles and between you. Date night could consist the both of you logging on to the same television show and watching it together.  Dating could be meeting up, virtually, for dinner.  Both prepare meals, have a seat and either face-time or call each other as you eat.  Creating little rituals like a nightly prayer with each other or lunchtime catch-ups.  Be creative with connections, but stay connected!  With all the social media and apps available there is really no excuse.

How can “venting” about your relationship be done in a positive way that doesn’t bash your partner?

Now I am a firm believer of venting.  It’s essential to let things out especially when you feel emotionally full.  But I have a question…who are you venting too?  Let me be very transparent…when I vent to my girlfriends about my husband, I am not nice or considerate…I’m mad as hell or frustrated…that’s why I’m venting!  But I have a squad that respects my marriage and they are mature enough to understand that things said while venting doesn’t equate to my overall feelings for my husband.  So they listen, sometimes laugh and advise me.  Not everyone is equipped to handle venting, even if they are family.  The person or persons you vent to should be people you trust and can be completely open with; without judgment.  You should not have to worry about their feelings towards your mate or if your words will change their perceptions.  Good friends advise, but then support.   Clean venting could consist of sticking to facts without using expletives or negative words to describe your mates’ behaviors or actions.  This can be done, but will you feel that you have emotionally gotten things out?  That’s something to take into consideration.