Breaking up is hard, and the recovery time for those involved varies from person-to-person. Some need months, others may even need years to get over an ex.

But, whether you were the person who did the breaking up, got your heart broken or it was cordial, once the relationship is over in the real world, how then, are things supposed to transpire on the world-wide-web? At times, two people’s lives are so intertwined with photos, videos and statuses documenting every memorable moment, that when they break up, they become two separate people with very contradictory views of the reasons behind their break up.

It’s a delicate process, to say the least, so we’ve listed the do’s and don’ts of handling the aftermath of a break up on social media.

No subliminal shading

Beyoncé said it best, “Always stay gracious,” and this rule couldn’t apply more.

The relationship is over, but at one point in time, you were in love, like, lust or all three with your significant other. Although things may have not worked out, it doesn’t mean he or she is a bad person and throwing subliminal shots every five minutes on Facebook only makes you look bitter and quite frankly annoying.

Unfollow, Unfollow, Unfollow

When you’re in a vulnerable state and listening to Drake on Pandora, it may be easy for you to feed into obsessive behavior and give yourself permission to stalk your ex on social media. Here’s a tip: Don’t!

Many years were put into a relationship with this person so the urge to want to continue to feel connected is understandable, but this, my dear, is the worst kind of torture and only leads to more feelings of hurt and contempt.

It’s best to unfollow them immediately after a break up to give yourself time to get over them and move on. It may not be forever; maybe in the future you all can be friends.

RIP Old photos of you and ex together

Yes. I said it. It’s time to delete those old photographs. No matter how good you looked in that outfit with your ex on your shoulder, it’s still time.

By keeping photos of you two together, it sends a message to other potential partners checking you out that you may still be engaged with your ex and again only induces feelings of anguish and hurt for you.

No Ghost Following

I can’t tell you how many times my friends have laughed at previous mates who’ve tried to keep a watchful eye on them by sending ghost friend requests.

Rule of thumb: it’s always a bad idea. Not only is it embarrassing for you, but it completely undermines your self-esteem and makes you look desperate and pathetic, at the very least.

Instead, find more positive and healthy ways to spend your time, like getting over him.

Maintain Privacy and Heal offline

We get it. You’re hurt. You might even be downright pissed off about being let down, lied to or dumped, but ask yourself, “Will this matter in ten years?” The is answer is No, but a post of you angrily dishing all your dirty laundry can last forever, even after you’ve moved on.