Meet sexologist and author, Shan. She’s made quite the name for herself in the digital world for discussing topics most of us wouldn’t dare to bring up. Well, that’s exactly why Shan has been able to catch the hearts of many all over the world. She’s a sensation on platforms such as Facebook Watch, YouTube, and she’s just getting started. We caught up with Shan to find out who everyone cannot quit buzzing over!
Do you mind telling us a little about yourself and how you became an influencer on social media?
I work as a sexologist and I’ve been in the space of sex education for the past ten years. I got involved digitally because I had a book come out. In 2009, the emphasis to have a social following was not the same as it is now. I had no influence or where to tell my story directly. I felt like going digitally was just an easier place to start telling my narrative, my own way. I took a break from doing digital after the release of my book and didn’t really evaluate it again until 2015 when I really poured myself into it. Given the topics that I talk about, it really is important to have an unfiltered space where you can tell your story without any outside influence.
Do you mind discussing your web series, Make Up or Break Up? What is the main message you want your viewers to gain from each episode?
I would love to call it my web series but it’s not. (laughs) It is a web series that I am a host on. It was an idea created before me. When they brought me into the picture they had an idea of what they wanted, they just need someone to voice that could amplify it. The conscious of the show is pretty simple. We have a couple come in and we use digital for crowd sourcing. For twenty minutes, people talk about their relationships, the highs and the lows and in the end the audience votes LIVE whether they think the couple should stay together or go their separate ways.
Could you share something with us about yourself that your viewers don’t know about you?
You know what, I don’t have that for you (laughs) For a living, I share myself online. I’m not saving anything. I think the beautiful part of doing social media in that way is recognizing that it is a safe place for me to share. I was trying to think of a cool one, but I don’t know if there is one.
How did you become so open to share your story with others on camera?
I really think it’s just recognizing the oneness in all people. We’re all afraid of sharing because we think people will judge us. Whether it’s different characters, different timelines, different settings, we all pretty much go through the same struggles. We all have the same ups and downs, we want the same things for the heart of it, so really, what’s the worst that can happen by sharing my perspective? Sometimes people can judge but most of the time people can relate. I’ve seen so much more power from people who can relate than those who judge. It feels like an easy trade off to take that risk.
To become the woman you are today, I’m sure you’ve had to face many challenges. Do you mind sharing a learning experience you believe would help others?
My 2018 lesson is, don’t try to be nice beforehand, in the moment, you have to be assertive or a jerk. By that, I just mean that there is just a constant learning curve of owning who you are, being able to voice that and being comfortable with that fact that some people may not like that but the ones that don’t like it, wouldn’t be the ideal pick for you anyway. I think in my career, even my love life, I find that knowing who you are and being comfortable with it to share, as you get older it becomes something you have to tackle. I always see the benefits when I speak out or walk away from things that I felt afraid to lose, I always benefit from it in the long run.
What does 2018 have in store for Shan?
I like to think of myself to be the ‘Martha Stewart’ of sex and relationships. It could be anything. A book, more of the series, I would love to produce content somewhere, it’s just finding cool places where we can tell our stories, where we can all relate but very rarely get to talk about it out loud. That was my goal last year but I want to put it on my forefront this year. And who knows, maybe a new car. (laughs)
FEATURED IMAGE: Shan | Instagram