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When you speak to Jay Barnett, you’re not just having a conversation — you’re stepping into a movement. A former professional athlete turned therapist, author, and mental health advocate, Jay has made it his life’s work to heal from within and inspire others to do the same. Our interview, held during Men’s Health Month in June, could not have been timelier — especially given the dire need for authentic dialogue around Black men’s mental and emotional well-being.

“I never thought I’d be doing this,” Jay admits at the top of our conversation. “But God’s plan is always greater than ours.”

Jay’s journey is nothing short of transformative. A two-time suicide survivor, he opens up about the identity crisis he experienced after leaving professional football — a space that once served as both his passion and emotional outlet. “Football was where I could release my pain. Without it, I didn’t know who I was.”

Raised in a household fraught with emotional and physical abuse, Jay’s internalized trauma ran deep. It wasn’t until his godmother confronted him after a second suicide attempt that he began to seek professional help. “She said, ‘You’ve got to get help.’ And that’s when everything began to shift.”
That shift led Jay into therapy — not just as a patient, but eventually as a practitioner. What began as a personal healing journey became a professional calling. “Most men aren’t asked how they feel. We’re expected to perform, to lead, to survive — but rarely to feel. And when you don’t have an outlet, you become a servant to your pain.”

Jay’s transparency is unmatched. He recounts sitting in therapy and being asked to describe how he felt. His response? “Lost, inadequate, and like a failure.” That moment became a breakthrough — not just in healing from his past but in beginning to discover his voice.
That voice would go on to shape ‘Just Heal Bro’, his groundbreaking tour and initiative that has inspired men across the country to speak openly, embrace vulnerability and reclaim their power through healing. “I wasn’t writing that book for other men,” he shares. “I was writing it for little Jay. The man who finds his voice finds his way.”

Jay’s approach to masculinity is deeply nuanced and spiritual. He challenges outdated ideas of strength and urges men to understand that they can be both the lion and the lamb. “We don’t have to disown our masculinity to embrace our sensitivity. Jesus was both. So can we.”

Now at 43, Jay continues to evolve and expand his mission. He’s pursuing a doctorate in healthcare and working on his next book, Pursuing Pace, which focuses on mental exhaustion and finding sustainable balance in a world that never slows down. “PACE stands for Pathways to Alleviating Cognitive Exhaustion. When we’re mentally depleted, we can’t make healthy decisions. We crash — and we’ve normalized that.”
When asked what he’d write in a letter to his younger self, Jay doesn’t hesitate: “You’re going to come out on the other side.”
His message to today’s youth is equally powerful. “We protect our boys by teaching them to value themselves. When you value your life, you can’t crash out.”
As we closed out our conversation, Jay left me — and undoubtedly our readers — with this parting truth: “You are worth seeing who you can become.”

In a world that often prioritizes performance over presence, Jay Barnett stands as a reminder that emotional wellness is strength — and that true leadership begins with healing. His journey from the gridiron to the therapist’s chair illustrates the power of vulnerability, the courage it takes to face generational pain, and the grace found in transformation. He’s not just speaking to men — he’s speaking to the little boy inside so many of them who never got a chance to be heard, to be seen, to be loved out loud.

Through his books, public speaking, and everyday advocacy, Jay is carving out space for a new kind of masculinity — one rooted in self-awareness, compassion, and community. His message is clear: Men can no longer afford to suffer in silence. Healing is not only possible — it’s necessary. And for anyone wondering if it’s too late to start again, his life is living proof. There’s purpose on the other side of pain.

Jay Barnett is not just building a platform — he’s building a legacy.

Follow Jay Barnett on Instagram and visit his website for more.

Photo Credit: Kauwuane Burton

About the author: Desirae L. Benson is an award-winning entertainment publicist and journalist. Find out more by following her Instagram page.